Sunday, January 10, 2010

Day 10: The power of the last page

I have made it to the end of one of my journals. So satisfying to finish a journal. But even better, tomorrow I get to start another. Reminds me of the first day of class when we got our new notebooks. Fresh empty pages full of possibility.

I grew up in bilingual Canada so my notebooks always said "Notebook/Cahier," and now every time someone says "notebook" I think "cahier."

Notebook.

Cahier.

See?

I'm following.  

Knowing I was on the last three pages, I decided to be completely honest about things I never ever would dare write in my journal, since I'll probably toss the journal soon anyway and potential prying eyes will never see what I wrote. Bwah-ha-haaaa.

Why is it that I am afraid to write certain things in my journal? No one is reading it and even if someone did pick it up to read it, they probably wouldn't understand it or know who I'm talking about. In fact, when I review my own journals even I don't know who I'm talking about half the time.

And yet, I still have a fear that someone will read it and will get mad or hurt by what I wrote.

I wonder what I would write if I knew for certain that no one would ever read it. I wonder if I would get more out of these morning pages.

I think that the next journal will be filled with the full on truth. No holds barred. And I will hopefully learn to trust that no one will read it. Let's see how that goes.

Status: Day 10 and I've done morning pages everyday and blogged about it everyday. Three cheers for me!


Go Janice!

Thanks.


2 comments:

  1. Maybe you need to hang onto your journals and hide them so no one sees them. If you really toss one in the trash, it might get read! I would totally read someone else's if I found it in the trash. :)

    Seems to me that journals are SUPPOSED to be used for writing all the honest, bad(ish) stuff. They're there to help us process that sort of thing - so I think you'll be doing yourself a great service by allowing all that honesty to come out finally!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mel,

    I couldn't agree with you more. Check out Day 11, where I really wrote all the honest, bad(ish) stuff. Break through!

    Three cheers for me!

    Janice

    ReplyDelete

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