Monday, January 4, 2010

Day 4: Body Issues

Today's morning pages were about working through my body issues. Yesterday I went to visit new people. New people who I fear will judge me. So, naturally I sucked in my gut and fidgeted with my shirt the whole time. Looking down to see if my belly looked particularly bulgey. I doubt these new people were judging me on my belly. I wasn't judging them on their bellys. But now that I think about it, their bellys were just fine.

Belly is a funny word.

So, in my morning pages I worked with this belly business. I forgave myself for judging my body. The truth is that my body is a pretty good companion. Doesn't get sick often (save for that unfortunate stomach flu over the holidays), strong when called to be (often when I insist on making it in one trip from the car to my apartment with my Trader Joe's groceries), and looks nice in the Editor pants from Express.

Pants is also a funny word.

She also forgives me when I judge her. She knows the truth, that I was anxious about meeting new people and I took it out on my belly. She doesn't take it personally. She's nice that way.

So that's what my morning pages were about. Some days it's about AT&T customer service, other days it's about my belly and healing.

It's all good.

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