Monday, March 8, 2010

Day 66: Why you'll never read my morning pages

Recently, I was asked why I don't post my morning pages on this blog. "Isn't that the whole point of your project?" they asked.

Uhhh. Reader, you do not want me to post my morning pages on this blog. The purpose of this blog is to share my experience of what happens when I do morning pages everyday for a full year. I'm hoping magical things happen, amazing, unbelievable things happen. If I posted my morning pages, the only things that would happen would be that I would bore you to tears or sleep (whichever comes first), I'd probably lose my job and I'd create chaos in my life instead of magic. So if you want to read them, you can forget it.

This blog is only for sharing my experience of writing morning pages everyday for a year, and hopefully, for inspiring someone out there (yes I'm looking at you, Reader) to consider taking on a practice of doing something like this in your own life (but no pressure).

Top 5 reasons you'll never read my morning pages.
  1. I can't be honest. If I knew you were reading my journal, I'd be editing all along the way. I would attempt to be entertaining and wouldn't talk about the mundane everyday blather that I just have to get out of my system, which brings me to reason 2:   
  2. They are boring. This isn't my inner critic talking. I'm not judging myself here. I'm just letting you know that there are a lot of lists of things to do and chicken scratch half-baked ideas that you wouldn't understand anyway, which brings me to reason 3: 
  3. I'm hatching evil plans. I write down the half-baked ideas and cook up the plans to make them happen. It's better to devise these plans in private and then announce them when they are ready to launch. One such evil plan was to create my Etsy store. And that brings me to reason 4:  
  4. I want to keep my day job so I don't have to rely on my Etsy store. I actually like my day job but I like it more when I get all the frustrations about it onto the page. After I release whatever is bugging me, it doesn't seem to bug me so much anymore. If anyone at work read my pages, they'd either send me to a therapist or HR because they would think I was really sad, mean and hurtful, which brings me to reason 5:  
  5. I say sad, mean and hurtful things. I go there in my pages. I go there because I need to figure my own shit out. If I get triggered by something a friend says to me, I have to figure out if I'm projecting my own stuff onto them, if they are projecting their stuff onto me, or if I'm simply suffering from premenstrual syndrome. If I wrote something that would hurt your feelings, it's not necessarily that I don't like you. I might just be cranky.
So if you want to read my pages, put it out of your mind. It ain't gonna happen. But, I'm so very happy that you've shown up here to read this. It's a much better read anyway. And if you keep coming back, you'll be the first to find out about the evil plans I'm cooking up. Bwah-ha-ha-haaa!



3 comments:

  1. I can't believe it's only day 66! It sure feels like you've been doing this blog for longer than that. Plus, it feels like we have been in 2010 for ages already. Just my two cents...

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  2. Your evil plans remind me of a wise cartoon character, "So, what we gonna do today Brain", "the same thing we do everyday, Pinky, try to take over the World". Brain was always hatching evil plans: you are the Brain! You are just rrying to take over the world, that's it.
    jule

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  3. I'm glad that despite your crankiness in your morning pages, you can come here and radiate positivity. Well done.

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